I Have a Famous Stalker!

When I was about 10 years old, my parents took my sister and I on "vacation" to Florida. We stayed in a really fancy hotel, only because my parents were having a convention there. There were about 3 pools and a shopping mall, all in the basement of this fancy hotel.

One of the speakers at the convention was Terry Bradshaw. I remember that he was a speaker because I rode downstairs in the elevator with him and his entourage. I think he patted me on my head, but I may be getting him confused with another celebrity that I rode with in an elevator in my formative years-Robert Young. I was on my way to the pool of course, and he was on his way to a meeting.

Now, 21 years later, who should walk into my restaurant today? Yep. Terry Bradshaw.

Too Sexy for my Skirt

I went to TARGET yesterday and found some fantastic clearance deals. I bought a cute little mini-skirt for $2.98!

I laid it on the counter after I got home, and Josh saw it. I asked if he liked it, and he said that he was having dirty thoughts. Intrigued, I went to try it on.

It was about 2 sizes too small! As I tried to wrestle it over my hips, I called Keira in and told her to push my butt into my skirt for me. We both tugged and pulled and pushed! I looked up at Josh and asked if I looked as hot as he had imagined.

He didn't answer...

I guess that is better than the answer he could've given!!

I did get the skirt on-all the way even, but I think I may wait a few months before I wear it out of the house! For now, I will just hang it outside of the closet where I can see it every morning, providing inspiration to get myself out of bed to workout!

Another Nose Story

I don't know why I like to talk about noses, but here I go again...

A few weeks ago, my friend at work told me an interesting (and gross) nose story that I would love to share with ya'll. About 20 years ago when my friend's daughter was just 2 or 3 years old, she started having a distinctive, disgusting smell radiate from her. My friend bathed her and scrubbed her, trying to get rid of the odor. She kept changing clothes and soaps to no avail. Then she thought that maybe it was just all in her head. She was a single mom, so she didn't have anyone else to smell her daughter for her; she just figured it was nothing.

Until the babysitter mentioned the smell! Uh oh. It wasn't all in her head, but she still didn't know what it was. Then, one day, my friend saw her daughter sticking a pencil up her nose. It turns out that there was a little toy in front of the pencil, and the daughter was using the pencil to RAM the toy further up into her sinus cavity!

There were all kinds of things up this child's nose! The smell was most likely coming from the food that had more than likely been up there for months! She took the baby to the doctor, where he had to take a rod and pull everything out of the kid's nose! My friend said it seemed like hours that she had to hold her, screaming, having the doctor pull little toy soldiers and peas out of her nose.

The smell was gone, though!

Now, imagine my horror when yesterday morning, I saw Keira sticking a little tiny Lego up her nose!! It was the kind that just has one little dot-I'm talking tiny! It was so far up in her nose that I couldn't see it. I took my tweezers and grasped at everything (which seemed to be nothing) up her nose as my daughter wriggled on the floor. I finally saw the little red bit of plastic, but I couldn't get it out. I pushed on the outside and pulled on the inside, the whole time imagining a trip to the hospital. By this time, I was sitting on her body and holding down her head with one hand and picking her nose with the other, all through screams of terror. I'm not sure if those were my screams or Keira's.

I did finally get it out. Keira told me she would never do that again because it hurt, but she then politely asked me to clean it off. She still wanted to play with the Lego.

Is the Sun Up Yet?

Keira has decided that she doesn't like sleeping anymore. It works out perfectly since I've been meaning to stop being so lazy. I mean, really, who needs to spend 6 hours at night in bed? I can be doing so many other productive things during this time--watching infomercials for example. Or cartoons. Thank you for saving me, Keira.

Happy Mattress Sale Day

This morning, Night was in the living room watching TV, and I was (of course) playing on-line poker in the den. Excitedly, Night came running into the den this morning. "Mom! It is 4th of July!"

"I know! Happy Fourth of July!"

"But, it is like a double Fourth of July!"

"What are you talking about?"

"Serta is having a mattress sale FOR THE FOURTH OF JULY! Isn't that exciting?"

"Um, yep. Honey, you don't even need a mattress." (He sleeps on the couch because we only have 2 bedrooms, and he wakes up his sister if he sleeps in his room, so we took away the bed.)

"I KNOW! But, I could get one if I wanted-it is on SALE. TODAY!"

"You are right. Super exciting."




I didn't see the commercial, but whoever wrote it must've done a great job-marketing to kids. That's an angle I would've never came up with on my own. Maybe that's why I'm not in advertising...

Too Much Mortal Kombat?*

This morning, Night told me that when he pees, he puts his knuckle-fists up behind his back just in case someone comes in to attack him. Always be prepared.






*No, my five year old does NOT play Mortal Kombat. I was just trying to be humorous. I actually think he got his neurosis from his father, who always checks the doors about five times to make sure they are locked.

5 Ingredients or Less

Shannon is sponsoring a themed Works for Me Wednesday this week-5 ingredients or less.

I have a yummy, healthy pancake recipe-full of protein and low in fat. They are made of ingredients that you wouldn't expect to be good together, but they are DELICIOUS. We eat them every week. Actually, we eat them pretty much everyday. I mix up the batter and store it in the fridge.

I LOVE this recipe!

12 egg whites
2 cups cottage cheese
2 cups oatmeal (dry cooking oats-regular kind, not instant)
1 tsp vanilla
1 tsp (or a little more!) of cinnamon

(I also recommend some splenda-but I don't want to go over the 5 limit. Consider it part of the recipe, though, really.)
This makes a double batch, so you might want to half everything when you make it the first time. You'll probably double it every time after that-if you eat them as much as we do!)

Just pop all the ingredients in the blender until they are batter consistency. I spray the pan (or griddle) and cook on medium. You can eat them plain with butter and syrup (we use "spray butter" and sugar free syrup) or add some blueberries or strawberries when they are on the griddle. You can also put sugar-free jelly on them. Yummy!

Check out other simple recipes at ROCKS IN MY DRYER!