Friday, June 29, 2007

I Waited on a Celebrity Today

Tyler Hilton was in town for a singing engagement and came in for breakfast today. And before you ask, he didn't pay the bill, so I don't know if he is a good tipper. His manager or whoever it was that was trying to schmooze him paid the bill, but he did leave a little over 20%, so I was happy.
In person, Tyler is super skinny and had really tall hair. He asked me to suggest a muffin for him, and I offered the double chocolate muffin since everyone loves chocolate (I don't like it, but I'm weird). He scoffed at it (politely), but then he did take me up on my second offer-the traditional yet very yummy blueberry muffin.
Malia and Shauna will be excited to know that when they came in, they sat at the same table he did today. Maybe THAT is why the deficient hostess wouldn't let them sit in my section-the celebrity gods had other plans...

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Talk about a Power Trip!

I got home from work yesterday, and Night told me that his dad was in the living room playing Father God.


Apparently, Josh had rented "The Godfather" for the Wii from Blockbuster. Night got his words mixed up...

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

You Guessed It!

Know what it sounds like when Keira says fork?!

Yep. FUCK.

Bed-Time Rituals

Kathy tagged me, so here goes:

6 weird things I do while getting ready for bed or while I'm sleeping-

1. When I'm tired-I sleep. No rituals or preparation. I sleep, and I get very grumpy if anyone tries to keep me awake.
2. I don't brush my teeth. Yes, I used to be a dental assistant, and yes, I know I should brush my teeth before bed, but I don't.
3. I don't wash my face either. I don't usually wear (much, if any) makeup and my face doesn't get too oily.
4. My son usually tucks me into bed at night. He sometimes tells me Thomas the Train stories that he makes up for me.
5. I like to have a glass of wine before bed. (or a beer or a cocktail that josh makes for me!)
6. I talk in my sleep. A lot of times when Josh comes to bed, he talks to me, and I talk back to him, but I don't know that the conversation happened.

I'm not very exciting, but oh well! I'm not technically tagging anyone, but I would really love for ya'll to write about it, so consider yourself tagged.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

What The Fuck?

Online Dating

Why do I find myself disappointed by this assessment?

I rated Josh's blog too (he never updates). He has the same evaluation. My rating was based on the word shit being used one time. Josh's had the word crap once. What does that tell you about our lives? (we have kids, right?)

I think I might write the word fuck a few times and try again. I don't want to be g rated...

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Scrambled Eggs...

Last night, Josh and I were sitting in the living room, trying to divy up duties-Keira needed her diaper changed, and we wanted some scrambled egg whites with ham. I then said, "Hey, Night, I have an idea-your dad can change Keira's diaper and you can make the eggs. I'll just sit here and watch tv."
Nights says, "OK!!" and disappears into the kitchen.

He then comes out and says, "Is it okay if the eggs and ham are cold? I'm not allowed to use the stove."
Still thinking he'll never be able to get into the eggs, I said, "Sure. Cold eggs and ham will be fine."
He then comes out with an egg (broken, by the way) in his hand and says he can't reach the plates.

"I'll get the diaper!" I say, as Josh runs into the kitchen to help cook!

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Sweet Tea

Here in the South, there is no such thing as regular tea. There is sweet tea, which is pre-sweetened with sugar. There is unsweet tea, which is not pre-sweetened. There is fruit tea, which is made differently in all restaurants, but usually consists of orange juice and sweet tea along with other fruit juices. Then there is hot tea of course.

Being from the North, I would assume that when someone orders "regular tea" (or just tea) they would mean hot tea. Unsweet tea would be called "iced tea," and there is no such thing as "sweet tea."

While living here in Nashville, I have come to know that there is no consistency when it comes to ordering tea. Some people mean sweet tea when they say regular; some mean unsweet; and still some mean hot tea. Nobody ever means fruit tea when they say regular tea, but they do sometimes refer to fruit tea as "tea punch" even though the fruit tea at my restaurant is actually made with ginger ale and is called "ginger tea" rather than "fruit tea" anyway.

I'm a very adaptable person. I can call what I have grown up knowing as "pop" a "coke." No problem. I've started saying "ya'll." It is kind of fun, but if ya'll can't get it figured out, how am I supposed to know what you are referring to when you say "regular tea?"

One more question-what's up with ordering half sweet tea and half unsweet? If you don't like it as sweet as we make it, just order unsweet and sweeten it yourself! There is plenty of sugar on the table!

Pathetic, but the Truth

I have been trying to get up before work in the morning and exercise. Just 20 minutes of exercise shouldn't be too difficult, right?! Well, I just don't do it. In fact, I've been sleeping 10 minutes more rather than getting up at the normal time. I know it is all in my head, and every night before I go to sleep, I psych myself up for getting up earlier. Every morning, though, I find an excuse to hit snooze one more time.

The excuse today? Keira was awake, and I wanted her to fall back asleep. Since we only have one bathroom, and it is in between our bedrooms, I didn't want to encourage her to be awake by going to the bathroom. I certainly can't exercise before peeing in the morning. SNOOZE.

Of course, I did find 3 minutes to write this post before work...

Friday, June 15, 2007

On to My Next RESTAURANT Rant...

Today I came home from work a little annoyed.

We have this little rule that if your full party is not at the restaurant when it is time to sit down, you cannot have a table. Yes, I realize this is very inconvenient for those of you who ARE at the restaurant waiting for a table. A very convenient way to get around this little rule is to be willing to order for the missing person. This will make everyone happy. As the person who is normally the last to arrive at little shindigs, I can appreciate the need to order my food ahead of time. I have a phone; I'd be happy to tell you what I want. This rule only applies to tables when we are on a wait. It is just rude to be a place-holder when there are other people who are willing to order food, eat, pay, and get out while you are just sitting there.

Here is a story about some pushy old women who bullied the hostess into letting them sit down at my table without the rest of their party:

I am what is known as the "opener" at my restaurant. I come into the restaurant about 1/2 hour before we open and I get all the stuff ready. I make tea; I cut lemons; I make coffee; I make back up coffee, lemons, and tea; I get silverware ready; I basically do a lot of shit that everyone else assumes just magically appears. I like being an opener because as soon as our waiting list disappears (and there are plenty of tables available to make sure we don't have to go back on a wait), I get to leave.

I, however, did NOT get to leave as soon as our wait was over today, due to these pushy old women-women who knew the rule and thought themselves above the rule, making my life a little bit miserable. The women sat down, with 3 other sets of silverware at the table. Knowing the rule, I kind of assumed the other women were either in the bathroom (we like to go in groups you know) or next door at the little shop. The women then ordered an appetizer to tide them over "until the others arrive". Whoa.

I took the order and got drinks then asked the hostess if she knew where the rest of the group was. She told me that they would be along in about 20 minutes, but one of the women was diabetic and NEEDED to eat. Now, I am NOT diabetic and don't really know too much about it, but I always thought orange juice was a good thing to tide you over-not spinach and artichoke dip. I was a little peeved at this point, but not too peeved. Normally, the main goal during lunch is to feed the customer and get them out in order to get the next customers to the table. I'm not saying that I rush people, but I do need to 'flip' the table in order to make some money. I'm not being greedy. I'm paying rent.

It was, however, close to time for the wait to be over, so I knew this would be the last set of people to sit at this particular table for the day. It is not that big of a deal because I could do my closing duties while the people finished eating, in theory. In reality, I did NOT finish my closing duties while the people finished eating. What did happen was 2 of the 3 people they were waiting for showed up and finished eating while I finished my closing duties. Then, as I am ready to drop off the check and go home, the last person shows up and orders, half an hour after I was FINISHED TAKING CUSTOMERS.

I then had to wait about a 45 minutes while the women chatted, all so I could collect their $4 tip and clean their table. I'm not saying that I don't appreciate the $4, so don't go getting all upset about that. I'm saying that I should not have been the one with this table. They should have waited until that last women arrived. When I again commented on the fact that the women were so late, the hostess just told me that we were almost off the wait by the time they sat down so other people weren't waiting for the table. THAT, was the point, though, wasn't it? We were off the wait so I shouldn't have had the table.

I was at work for over 8 hours today-on my feet running around for most of it. I was tired and just wanted to go home and be with my family. I'm not blaming all of my irritability on the pushy old women, just some of it. The hostess really shouldn't have picked an opener for these particular people, but I think that people who do take a long time at a table should compensate the waiter for their time. My time with my family is worth more than the $4 that the women left.

A few weeks ago, a fellow server had an even worse experience with this than I did today. Two ladies came into our restaurant at 9:30 in the morning. They left the restaurant at 4:00 in the afternoon. They left her $6. Even if you figure that table would have only 'flipped' once an hour and she would have only received $2 per table, she missed out on at least $12. $2 per table per hour is lousy, but that would've been twice as good as those two women!

I don't want ya'll to think that all I think about is money and the only reason I do what I do is for the cash. It isn't. I truly enjoy my job and have CHOSEN to be a server rather than any other profession. It isn't something I do because I'm too dumb to do anything else (I have a bachelors degree) or I can't get any other job. I enjoy working as a server. I would much rather wait on a nice and fun customer who tips normally (normal is at least fifteen percent, people) than a rude uppity customer who tips better.

But if you put it into terms of other occupations, when you go to work, you expect to get paid, right? How many of you would like to go to work one day and earn quite a bit less, just because someone felt like taking longer and not compensating you for it? If you take an abnormally long time at a restaurant, especially during busy times, please tip your server. We don't mind if you sit around and have a good time; we like it-that means you are happy and will return to the restaurant. We do mind, though, if it keeps us from paying bills!

Scratchy Kid

Last night, I was reading a book to the kids before Keira went to bed. It was about a mother zebra who was trying to get her baby zebra to go to sleep. To calm the baby, the mom licked the baby behind the the ears.

When I asked Night if I could lick behind his ears, he told me the I could not. He then said that I needed to find a soft kid to lick behind the ears. I asked him if he was soft, and he told me no-he is a scratchy kid.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Restaurant Etiquette

A while ago, there was a little discussion about being polite to servers. Since I spend A LOT of time in restaurants (okay-just seven days a week), I thought I might be a bit of an expert on the subject.

Being observant as I am (Josh is laughing out loud), I have come to notice that being polite to the server from the eyes of a customer is oh so different than from the eyes of a server. Since I don't think a lot of people are rude on purpose, I just want to let people, in general, know what I think is rude to me, your server.

I don't give a flying leap if you say please and thank you when you ask me for your food etc. I do, however, think it is extremely rude to tell me that you are ready to order then proceed to make me wait until you decide what you want. Here's my suggestion-are you ready to order? Then order. Not ready to order? Tell me that you aren't ready to order. I'll be back; I promise.

I find that a lot of times, the people who waste my time are the same ones that complain about their food taking too long to get to the table. How rude is that? By making me wait at their table while they decided what to order, they have slowed down my service to other customers, and ultimately to themselves.

In that three to five minutes that I stood in front of them I could've been: getting drinks for other people, taking food out of the kitchen, cleaning tables, getting desserts, getting take-out boxes, putting food orders into the computer, or collecting/returning money.

I'm not saying that I don't want to help you decide what to order if you need help; I am quite happy to give advice or explain the menu better. I just think it is stupid for customers to tell me they are ready then read silently in front of me for three minutes-or worse yet-have a conversation with each other while I'm waiting, but that rant is for another time...

If I don't stop now, this post will go on forever. Stay tuned for more helpful hints in making your (and my) dining experience better!

Monday, June 11, 2007

Are they Serious?

I just finished watching part of Wife Swap. Are they serious? They always have such STRONG personalities on that show-the one woman is a slave to her husband; the other man is a slave to his wife. Each person thinks the others' lives are despicable.

I just wonder how much of it is made for tv and how much of it is real.

Friday, June 01, 2007

Have you Seen This?

Wow! I don't have one of those fancy "electric locks" on either of my vehicles (actually, one of them got broken into about 4 years ago and doesn't even HAVE a lock...), so I can't try it out, but it is neat. and kinda scary!!

TV Upgrade How My Stupidity Got us A Big-Ass TV

Remember our wonderful garage sale find-the tv that doubled as a snooze button?!

Well, about a month ago, the tv took over 2 hours to turn on-after Josh spent pretty much the whole 2 hours pushing the on button because it kept turning itself off. After that, we didn't turn it off at all. You would think this would cut into the snooze time, but actually, if we left it on a cartoon channel, Josh could snooze for hours instead of minutes! (I'm always at work, so I don't get to snooze!) Yes, we are good parents like that.

Anyway, Tuesday when I left for work, the tv was on. When I got home, it was OFF. Josh's theory is that one of the cats stepped on the remote and turned it off. My theory is that it is an old tv and was tired of being on all the time. So, every 3-4 minutes or so, Josh would say, "TV" and Night would go and push the power button, to no avail. This, apparently had been going on all day. Neither boy would give up. Feeling sorry for them, I said we could look into getting a new one.

We got on-line to CraigsList and looked for some tvs for sale to decide if it would be better to buy a new one or a used one. First, I saw one for free! Yay! I called, and missed it by about 10 minutes. Someone else had called first, but she would call me back if they didn't show up. I looked at LOTS of different offers. Then, I saw a 27" tv for $50. I called him and asked him about it. He told me it was about 10 years old, but that it worked really well. Thinking I could get a better deal, I asked him if he'd take $20 less for it since it was so old. Sure! Great. Of course, when I was thinking about the tv, I thought it was advertised at $100, not $50, so I talked him UP to $80. Oops. So, I was all cocky when I came in and told Josh to get ready because we were gong to get a tv for $80! This is when he pointed out my stupidity....

Well, neither one of us wanted to call the guy back and tell him we wanted to pay $30 (or even $50), not $80, so we didn't get the tv. I looked on CraigsList a few hours later, and saw a 52" flat screen (theater screen) for TWO HUNDRED BUCKS! The guy was moving and didn't want to take the tv with him. So, there you have it-we got a big-ass tv for $200 bucks instead of a big tv for $50 or $80 or $30. It took some finagling to get it home, but now we have it, and my WII is awesome on it!!